You’re mad. Bonkers. Off your head. But I’ll tell you a secret; all the best people are.

- Alice in Wonderland

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Put on your seatbelts, everybody... Put on your food belts!

(Richard Simmons:)
Put on you seat belts, everybody! Put on your food belts!

Oh no! It's not that time of year again. No, it can't be! It can't be! Tell me. Pinch me. Tell me it's not here!

It's The Most Fattening Time of the Year
(Parody of It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year)


It's the most fattening time of the year
With that pumpkin pie filling
And everyone swilling
Down eggnog and beer
It's the most fattening time of the year

It's the lip-smackingist season of all
While you're shopping you're cheating
Impulsively eating
That junk at the mall
It's the heav- heaviest season of all

There'll be turkeys for basting
And stuffing for tasting
And giblets and gravy will flow
There'll be cookies that mom baked
And leftover fruitcake
From a Christmas a long time ago

It's the scale flattening time of the year
While your diet you're blowing
There's calories going
Straight down to your rear
It's the scale flattening time of the year

(Hey wait a minute. Wait a minute. I know there's food everywhere. Eggnog flowing out of fountains. It's like one big Bar Mitzvah. But listen, you don't have to do that. You could have small portions. And make ribbons instead of fudge. You can do it! Please try!)

There'll be after meal dozing
And arteries closing
Cholesterol levels will grow
It's too cold to go jogging
Too brisk for tobogganing
So pass me a hot buttered roll

Don't you dare touch that roll! I'm watching!

It's the most fattening time of the year
All those gingerbread shingles
And chocolate Kris Kringles
Will tremble in fear
It's the most fattening time
It's a belt loosening time
It's the most fattening time of the year
*** Sad to say, I am already feeling it!***
Click HERE to listen to a sample of the song... it's great =)

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